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Adult Jokes 35 Kinds of Sex 1.The first is Smurf Sex. This happens during the honeymoon period, you both keep doing it until you're blue in the face. 2.The second is Kitchen Sex. This is at the beginning of the marriage, you'll have sex anywhere, anytime, even in the kitchen. 3.The third kind is Bedroom Sex. You've calmed down a bit, perhaps have kids, so you gotta do it in the bedroom. 4.The fourth kind is Hallway Sex. This is where you pass each other in the hallway and say, "Fuck you!" 5.There is also a fifth kind of sex: Courtroom Sex. This is when you get divorced and your wife screws you in front of everyone in the room..... Little Johnny was in trouble again.....He was charged with the rape of a grown woman, and all though the crime seemed highly improbable, the state's evidence was overwhelming. As a last desperate move, the defense counsel came over to the witness stand, pulled down Little Johnny's pants, and grabbed the boy's tiny penis for all to see. "Ladies and gentlemen," the lawyer cried turning toward the jury box, "surely you cannot believe that such a small still undeveloped organ is sexually mature?" Growing more agitated he went on, "How could this miniature member be capable even of erection, let alone the rape of a fully grown woman." "WATCH IT," yelped Little Johnny. "One more shake and you'll lose the case!" Two teenagers wander off to the bushes during a softball game on the
outskirts of town and start necking. After a while the boy stops.
"You know we've been doing this for a few weeks now and I think it's
time we went all the way," he pleads. "Well, maybe," she
says, "But I'm a virgin and I heard it hurts. Besides all those
people at the field may hear us." The boy stops and says, "Hmmm,
well then if it hurts, start making cow sounds, and I'll stop. But if it
feels good start singing. That way no one will ever guess what we're
really doing." The girl agrees so they quickly take off their clothes
and get down to business. Ten minutes later people watching the game hear
sounds echoing through the quiet countryside so loudly that the teams stop
playing. |
